Tuesday 5th June 2018
Bono: "Desire... greed... showy-offness... deceit, haha!... lust... vanity – all the essentials for a showman like me. And of course... a licence to just... look in the mirror." [approaches tablet computer on a stand; sees a devilish face superimposed over his own image]
Crowd: [screams and applause]
MacPhisto: [admiringly] "Ohh. So very revealing!"
MacPhisto: "Age... can bring a..." [points to lesion on his cheek] "...spot of bother!" [sniggers] "Is there a dermatologist in the house?" [evil laughter]
Crowd: [laughter and whoops]
MacPhisto: "My name is..." [clears throat] "Mr... MacPhisto!"
MacPhisto: "Hahaha. I-- I'm having somewhat of a comeback. Especially... south of the border." [evil laughter]
MacPhisto: "I mean, the American Dream... has turned into an absolute nightmare!" [evil laughter] "Assault rifles and nuclear weapons, in the..." [flutters fingers] "...tiny hands of children." [sniggers]
MacPhisto: "The Americans have the same problem with guns as the Irish have with alcohol."
Crowd: [laughter and cheers]
MacPhisto: "Meaning... what problem?!" [hysterical laughter] "What problem – d'you fucking get it?!"
Crowd: [laughter and applause]
MacPhisto: "Okay. Oh, I do love... I do love a good trade war." [sniggers] "I mean, the G-string 7 was supposed to be sitting around talking about the hundred and thirty million girls who don't go to school, 'cos they're girls... and now, they're gonna be talking about... steel... and fucking maple syrup!"
Crowd: [cheers and applause]
MacPhisto: "Ahahahaha. You can't make this shit up. Anyway... Montréal, mon amour..."
MacPhisto: "Just so you know... I do my best work when you don't believe that I exist."
MacPhisto: "Don't believe what you hear. Don't believe what you see. If you just close your eyes... you can feel... THE ENEMYYY!" [raises and waves his arms]
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