Dutch flag Tuesday 11th May 1993
Rotterdam, the Netherlands

Feyenoord Stadium


[Desire ends with MacPhisto crying "I'll huff... and I'll puff... and I'll blow your house down!  I have a vision!  I have a vision!  What a night... what a show... what a life... what a job. I have a vision!"]

MacPhisto: "Eurovision. Eurovision!  How are we all tonight, then?"

Crowd: [cheer]

MacPhisto: "I think you're just about the most intelligent rock 'n' roll audience, perhaps in the world. That's of course because you like me!"

Crowd: [cheer]

MacPhisto: "Off with the horns, on with the show. Well, what a thing rock 'n' roll turned out to be, then. What do you think of it, young lady? Do you think I'm exciting?"

Crowd: [cheers and wolf whistles]

MacPhisto: "I was there when it started, you know. Way back in the '50s, I had a great idea – African rhythm and European sense of melody. Put the two together and – schmooks! – we had a very exciting movement. And we've come a long way, haven't we!"

Crowd: "Yeah!"

MacPhisto: "Everybody's into it now. Lady Diana's into it... do you think Queen Bea would be into it? Shall we give her a call and find out?"

Crowd: [cheers and applause]

MacPhisto: "Now, you'll have to be a little patient – sometimes she's quite hard to get through to. She's a busy girl, you know. So am I..."

[dialling tone]

MacPhisto: "Queen Beatrix, let me see."

[dials]

MacPhisto: "Oh-seven-oh, three-five-six, four-zero-zero-zero. And who says I don't give out my famous friends' phone numbers? We're all kind of family here, aren't we!"

Crowd: [cheer]

Man: "Rijksvoorlichtingsdienst."

MacPhisto: "Hello?"

Man: "Ja?"

MacPhisto: "Hello, I wish to speak to Queen Beatrix. ...Hello?"

Man: "Yeah, I've said hello."

MacPhisto: "Do you speak any English?"

Man: "Little bit."

MacPhisto: "If, if you could be patient with me, I'm, I'm, um... I'm here with a few friends, and we're just trying to find out..."

Crowd: [cheer]

MacPhisto: "We're just trying to find out if Queen Beatrix is a fan of rock 'n' roll. Do you think she'd like rock 'n' roll music, or would it be, perhaps, too loud for her? ...Hello?"

[man hangs up]

Crowd: [boos and whistles]

MacPhisto: "Well, now! The last time a royal hung up on me, I sent the House of Windsor into flames!"

[Ultra Violet begins]


[ Back to MacPhisto transcripts ]