29th May 1993
Note: If any Dutch speakers can confirm how the man answers the phone, please get in touch – many thanks!
MacPhisto: "Off with the horns, on with the show. Look what you've done to me! You've made me very famous, and I thank you. I'd like to introduce you to my band. On my right here, known to his friends as Reggie the Dog... The Edge. Sitting behind the drum kit, a man who could put Bruce Springsteen out of a job – Larry Mullen Junior. And on my left, a man with a ginormous willy – Adam Clayton!"
MacPhisto: "...But it's not as big as my one. No, ha-ha. Round about this time at night, I often make a telephone call. Sometimes to the President of the United States. But not tonight. I'm calling a taxi to take me home."
Crowd: [shouts and boos]
MacPhisto: "Don't get me wrong, I love you! But I love myself also. And I'm very tired. I am, after all, the last pop star."
[phone rings for some time]
MacPhisto: "Oh, do hurry up."
[phone continues to ring]
MacPhisto: [pretends to check his watch] "Time flies when you're having a good time, doesn't it? My heavens."
MacPhisto: [sings] "Laaa da daaa da-da daaa..."
Man: [sounds like "Taxi Werchter, goedenavond"?]
MacPhisto: "Hello, excuse me, do you speak English?"
Man: "Yeah, a little."
MacPhisto: "Thank you ve-- you're very good, I really appreciate that. I'm Irish myself." [clears throat] "I'd like to order a taxi to take me home."
Man: "Yes. Where you are?"
MacPhisto: "I'm, I'm at, erm... well actually, I'm everywhere. My name is MacPhisto."
MacPhisto: "And I know you very well."
MacPhisto: "I know you probably even better than you know yourself."
Man: "Yeah, where are you?"
MacPhisto: "...Uh, I beg your pardon? How dare you speak to me like that."
Man: "WHERE ARE YOU?"
MacPhisto: "Do you know who you're talking to?!"
MacPhisto: "Do you know who you're talking to?"
[Ultra Violet begins]
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