MacPhisto: [sings] "Try a taste of Martini, the most beautiful drink in the world!  It's the right one!  It's the bright one, that's Martini!"

MacPhisto: "I love that one... so good. Show business – don't you love it? Rock and roll. All my idea. African rhythm and European melody. What a good idea. It all started in Cuba."

MacPhisto: [sings] "Ba-ba ba ba, ba-da ba ba..."

MacPhisto: "Now look – everybody's into it! They're all into the rock – rocking in the free world. Even Lady Diana's into it now. Don't you think she's funky?"

Crowd: [laughter and wolf whistles]

MacPhisto: "I think everybody gives her too hard a time, I think she's gorgeous... and sexy. Shall I give her a telephone call?"

Crowd: "Yeah!"

MacPhisto: "People give you their telephone numbers when you're famous. It's one of the good things."

[dials]

MacPhisto: "Oh-seven-one, nine-three-oh, four-eight, three-two."

MacPhisto: [sings] "Getting to knowww you... la-la-la-laa..."

Woman: "Buckingham Palace."

MacPhisto: "Hello, could you put me through to the Prince of Wales' apartments, please? Thank you. ...Hello? Don't be shy, now..."

[phone rings]

Crowd: [cheer]

MacPhisto: "She's not a shy girl!"

MacPhisto: [sings] "Keep me hanging on the telephone... la-la-la laa la-laa... la-la la-laa..."

[ringing continues]

Woman: "No reply, I'm sorry!"

MacPhisto: "Hello, my name is Mr MacPhisto. I'm looking to speak to the Princess of Wales, if that's alright."

[ringing resumes]

MacPhisto: "I must be in the know. You don't mind waiting, do you?"

Crowd: "No!"

MacPhisto: "You've such good manners in this town, really."

MacPhisto: [sings] "Lalala la la-la-la... la-laa la-laa..."

[ringing stops]

MacPhisto: "Hello? Hello...? Hello... is that Lady Diana? Hello? You needn't be shy, I'm just here with a few friends."

Crowd: [cheers and whistles]

MacPhisto: "Hello?"

MacPhisto: [sings] "I just called to say I love you... I just called to say how much I care..."

MacPhisto: "Hello...?"

[Ultra Violet begins]

MacPhisto: [sings] "Sometimes I feel like I don't know, sometimes I feel like checking out... I want to get it wrong... can't always be strong... and love it won't be long..."